2 babies and Pandemic restrictions

My 2 babies (18 months and 11 weeks).

Both born during different restrictions.

No visitors allowed at the hospital to welcome them to the world.

Very few Antenatal appointments because of staff resources being taken to other areas to help with the Pandemic and trying to avoid midwives and Obstetricians catching COVID.

Both high risk pregnancies with complications. Both babies were born earlier than full term because of complications.

No baby shower for the 18 month old. Had to leave the 11 week old baby shower early and go to the hospital because of a fall.

Both have only seen extended family and friends once or twice, if at all.

No more babies for me because of complications that meant I needed my tubes removed.

I will never get to experience some of the things you are meant to during pregnancy and once the baby is born.

I never thought some things that I originally saw as such a small part of the pregnancy and afterwards, like the hospital visits once the baby is born, would mean so much to me during what is meant to be a such a happy time.

Feeling the happiness of having a new baby mixed with the feeling of missing out on experiences that my sister and other women I know were lucky to have.